THE COMPLETE STATE OF CONFUSION

How does one survive in a National Institute? You have people from alllllllll parts of the country and there is way too much cultural interaction, or should I say cultural confusion. There are people from Patinda, Lahore, Kashmir, Ludhiana, Erode and the internal parts of every state in the country. And there are way too many Bengalis( or Bongs ) than what you can handle. So there is this big community thing they have and they discuss calcutta, rasogollas and bengali actresses all the time ( Bipasha Basu and Koena Mitra are hot favourites). Makes you wonder why the girls from Bengal are hot and the guys are not! Did I by the way mention that 5 out of 7 guys in my class are Bongs? And then they start talking in Bengali. Trust me, getting stuck in a crowded bus with fighting women screaming stuff and talking in local singara chennai bashai is anyday better.

BEING MADRASI
However, this language is not too hard to comprehend though. It sounds like they are talking in Hindi with a rasagulla stuck in their mouth . The 'kahan' becomes 'kahoaon' and anything with 's' becomes 'sh' (namma aiyer athu mamis mathri). So if they ask me in hindi where I'm going, it becomes , " Shitha,kahoan you going?". At times however trying to figure out wat the core subject of their discussion is becomes a herculean task........like at times I get zapped cos I don't know if they are bitching about me or talking about the weather in Gujarat. And here comes the best part........They think South indians, especially chennaites dont have a life ( cos we dont go to the coffee shop every half hour and a smoke every one hour and we dont run and buy tickets when Euphoria or Bipasha Basu is performing). And furthermore they think that we(Tamilians or Madrasis as they address anybody who belongs to the south) have a typical south Indian accent like the guys with vibuthi patta in the hindi movies do! ( Even if i do, I dont atleast sound like I have an athirasam in my mouth!)

TRANSCENDING LANGUAGES (AND CREATING A FEW IN THE PROCESS)
And then 'chumma' which means 'just like that' in Tamil and which is a prefix of every sentence of mine provides them with entertainment. Cos they take the chumma to be the hindi chumma which means kiss. So heres me trying to explain to my group about how the hinge of the box of a utility product we designed works in geometry class. " now chumma, lets assume tat it has the openin here" and the next thing i know, they are all missing, cos they are under the table laughing their hearts out. HELP .Its been more than two months but I dont see any light at the end of the tunnel ! And I have an amazing faculty , all who believe in talking and teaching in Hindi. Considering how good my observation skills are and how good I am at understanding (especially Hindi), I have now solid excuses to give my mom when I go back home and explain why I'm last in class. And its better hindi than English. Cause they slaughter it. I mean, no bones barred slaughter.INSTANCE: " When you go TO abroad no, like when you go america, there are lot of opurtunitis.You have to learn a lot like what maderial and what is style they using no?" Its actually quite simple if you want to learn it.....just add 'to' as and when you please, and the places where you actually have to use them, don't! And then when the words are larger than 6 letters, don't even try to learn how to pronounce them. Just use them in the right context and expect people to understand. Like 'conscience' becomes 'conces'. 'Psychology' becomes 'psychoo - logy'. Then stress the last syllable of all the words you know. ( Which of course are five lettered or less). Saiddddd. Wastedddd. Moneyyyy. Sitaaaa.Cheee.

THE HAPPY ENDING ;-D
Its not such a bad thing after all, all this communication problem. Cause when the bong guys in class think i am talking about the weather in Tamil with my classmate, I am actually bitching about them ( wicked grin). And i don't need to get under the table to laugh when i do so!